One exciting day

After many days i am so thrilled, spoke to my age old buddy after he has come back , and the amazing part the  whole gang is planning to go on a holiday , the trip will be to the hill stations of India & will end up at my place.

Love you all


Nimisha

Buddha and the four horses

The Buddha once told his monks that there were four kinds of horses. The first (very good), upon seeing the shadow of the whip, is startled and follows the wish of its rider. The second (Good), startled when the whip touches its hair, & follows the wish of its rider. The third (poor) is startled after the whip touches its flesh. The fourth (Bad) is awakened only after the touch of the whip is felt in its bones & its hurt badly.

So there are people (very good) who are already awakened about their responsibilities towards their loved ones, some people (good) learn about their responsibilities & feel the attachment with their loved ones when they see someone at distant loosing their loved ones, the Third ones realize the importance of love when they loose someone close to them & the final (bad ) only realizes when everyone close to him abandon them for being alone all through their life & suffer the pain of being lonely.

We need to choose, which one we want to be.

Why not

Yes, why not, my life is easy, i wish who ever says this, come and live it for a day.I am living or dieing nobody cares, I am happy or sad no one is bothered, days important to me are not celebrated, after working the whole day to make things work out, i only get to listen , What i have not done in the whole day. Can i have my life back what it was! I dont wanna talk to anyone anymore, I am literally tired of making people happy around me, its sickening.

I owe you my smile

Even after all these years also how come you know when i need a smile , even without saying a single word, thanks for making me realize that how i was running after all immaterial things in life & after people who do not care about me, i have stopped now.

Sorry for not being there when you needed me.

I miss you everyday

Now I know why you never bought Dolls for me & gave me bats  & tanks to play with, now i got to know why you took my opinion & gave me responsibilities even when i had no understanding of anything, now I saw why unlike other girls I was never served things on a platter. Now I see the reason why I was left alone to face situations and you never told me to come back even when it was most difficult of times.

Thanks for raising me differently , because God had a different plan for me & you were only  preparing me for it.

I owe everything to you, & will try to complete every responsibility for which you left me.

I miss you very much papa & I am sorry for being angry on you on my last birthday, never knew it would be the last with you.

Love you very much.

Watch Out

Feeling very lonely today and dont know why, may be because of all good old memories, people who cared about me, made me feel that i exist for them in an important way. I was pampered by everyone , Papa & mumma started it, friends in college made it worse.

I know everyone is dealing with issues in their lives &  everyone now have their own priorities ,other than making me feel good & happy all the time, but i hate to be less important.

Previously,
Surprises = too many, tiresome (never valued them that time)

Now,
Surprises = do not exist

I miss all those daily dose of chocolates, my first bicycle, walks to ATMs, Guitar sessions, bagfull of cryons, out of no where candle lit dinner.

People say, whatever you give, you get back, but when? i am tired of being the good old nanny, cant really do it anymore..need a break from everything.

Pledge: For people to whom i am not important, they would not be matter of importance for me from now (Want to scream).

Thank you blogger, for giving me a space where i can write whatever i feel (Good , Bad or Ugly about myself, without being hyprocrite where i have to be only picture perfect & look happy all the time)

Deepawali

I know its been more than ten days that Diwali has gone, but being very puntual about my unpunctuality i m posting the diwali updates now.

This time, for me Diwali was an interesting day made up of  a night halt, a long flight, a cup of coffee & last but not the least a lot of fun! So this diwali was my first Diwali after my marriage, n it was serious fun .Posting some of the pics:

The divine lights

CM & RD  after the entire prep of Pooja

oyeeeeeeee

Sanjib



eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

 Had a great Deepawali

Driving out

In continuation of doing my stupid silly things...yesterday at night was feeling very down & sad so took out my vehicle & drove till the outskirts of the town, i know it was crazy but made me feel gud.


Some bizzare pic that i took while driving

One Day of Being me

Last  weekend i planned up for a sudden trip to Raipur (Most of my trips are sudden only & end up paying too much for the tickets) : Reasons one & only reason and that was, wanted to have fun with people of my liking. Packed my bag with two pair of clothes & some cash in hand & started off... reached Raipur station at night with ba took an auto and directly headed to our family house but in the mid of it , stopped at "The Chocolate Story" , its a F&B outlet specializing in chocolate based drinks & yummy chocolate tit bits, there chocolate sandwich is a yummmm....so ba went & as per my instructions got our things packed while i was sitting &  praying her to come back soon, as the autowala was looking really unhappy about our sudden unplanned stopover.

She came back and we started having our stuff in the auto only , i was too excited to try out their highly praised stuff...& guess what in this whole enjoying our food thing, we lost our way ...anyway both of us tried our "find the way" skills, & reached home.

A blurred pic of The Chocolate Story

My cousin was waiting and from that point onward party started ,next day got up early ( read : 10 am that too when ba woke both of us) but on weekends this is early..

 

We went to Magneto this is one of the biggest Mall there , the first thing did was watching a 4D scary movie, screamed  & laughed at the same time, ate momos after a long time, ba had Fish Spa , & i finally got to meet one of my buddy from my CCD Days-Soumen . Had a fun time with all of them..

Momo- same as momo aunty's momos (exclusice to IHM Kolkata)

Ba enjoin Fish Spa

Sometimes it becomes neccesary to take a break from all your work & everyday routine & be the one you actually are, even if it sounds stupid to other, as it makes you feel the warmth of fresh air of happiness around you....

Love you all ! 

Without you

Post by Ankita (my sister) :Its a composition by her, never knew she writes so beautifully.Thank you for sharing here.

"Without You"

Days turned to weeks & weeks turned to years,

There are thousands of my tears,

That I shed for you,

About which you never knew,

There is so much suffering &  so much pain,

And there is no one to whom I can explain,

If you would have understood me ,

There was no need of me going  to anyone else,

               And after all these years of loving you I feel ,

  All my cries are in vain.

                              

                                                                                                     -Ankita

1st guest post: "Am I an addict?"

 Post by Srijan

Am I an addict?

A week ago, Nimisha wrote a blog post on her addiction to shopping. Since addiction is a theme that has always attracted me, an attempt to analyse whether I am one or not seemed like an appropriate way of taking up some space in her blog.

An addict is generally defined in the dictionary as a person who is physically and mentally dependent on a particular substance or activity. If that is so, then I am an addict. Not to alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, or to any other substance, but to inactivity itself, which is the only activity I truly engage in.

Of course, this inactivity is difficult to diagnose, for its symptoms never remain the same. They take up different forms at different times in different situations, but the inactivity that lies just below the surface remains constant. Over the last month or so, for instance, I have begun almost every single day by logging into Facebook only to remain logged in for the rest of the day until I finally log out at bedtime. This cycle is broken only when I am some place where there is no computer screen to stare at.

Since there is no point in simply remaining idle on Facebook, I update my status on it every single day, mostly by sharing links and writing 420 characters each on every one of them. Once I found out that I wanted to do this on a daily basis, I also wanted to come up with a system for it. Accordingly, I decided that I would try to update my status every day at midnight, which meant that I needed to find a link and write 420 characters on it every day, too. Not happy just with a fixed time at which to update my status every day, I also came up with a system for deciding which links to share every day. To that end, I decided to log into Britannica every day to go through their ‘This Day in History’ so that I can finalise which event or birth to commemorate by sharing a link related to it. Once the occasion is finalised, I go to Google Videos in search for an appropriate video, which usually happens to be a documentary. This, in short, is the system that I have devised for Facebook. I, of course, deviate from it on some days, but this template remains the same throughout.

I believe that this proves beyond all reasonable doubt that I am addicted to Facebook. However, it does not prove that I am addicted to inactivity since what I have described above also entails some activity. To me, however, any activity that I should not engage in, especially if it is at the cost of something that I should be engaged in instead, is equivalent to inactivity. And if that be the case, one would be hard put to find a person more addicted than I. I only hope not for long.

 Image 2: source google

A new start

As a blogger, i know, even when you love writing, sometimes it gets difficult to maintain the blog, some of my friends who write fabulously started their blogs but after sometime either deleted the blog or kept the writing space unused because of the difficulty of maintainence. so while talking to Srijan today, an idea struck that why not i share this space of mine with people who are close to me & let them share their thoughts & experience without being in pressure to maintain the blog & create a forum where all of us can independently contribute & express ourselves !!!

A day of Introspection

I follow one of the Art of living programme, so yesterday the speaker was  talking about the most crucial topic that every one of us are dealing with & i.e. RELATIONSHIPS.

They dealt with issues like lack of understanding, Honesty, & Trust in relationships, and i was surprised that every one was dealing with the similar kind of issues in different form of relationships.

I feel we have made everything so complex, atleast me, i expect different behaviours from different people for the same situation, like i keep calling "R" the whole day that whether he had his food, what he is upto, when he is coming home and feel he doesnt understand my concern when he gets irritated , but when the same concern is shown by mum , i get  agitated sometimes, thinking that  I am not a kid anymore.....so eventually I get hurt from both the side...and its not because of anyone else i guess there is a problem in my behavioural attitude.

The speaker of the programme said that we can change ourselves & be happy rather than telling other people to change which is rather difficult or sometimes not possible.But i guess it is not that easy to follow , but i am still trying to better myself and keep my status calm and indulge myself into positive things rather than sitting idle after office.I really want to better myself as in want my soul to be so strong that it does not get affected or disturb because of things which are not really of much importance.

Om Shanti

Shopping -An Addiction?

So, it started with a  book , then few gifts for friends, then clothes , cosmetics so on & so on...and now the list seems unending...yes i have become a complete shopping addict..Somebody save me!!!

Two days back i saw one of my very closest friend "A" updated her Facebook status abt how, she is doing over-shopping & wants to stop, then i realised that i too have become a compulsive shopping addict, my house and specially my wadrobe is filled with unwanted clothes, books, too much of cosmetics , still unused fragrances n what not...and most of this things out of these , i have bought online...reasons great discounts, they deliever at doorsteps n the biggest reason i m a complete jerk.


Today while watching "Keeping up with Kardashians" series, i was taken aback how Ms. Kim was overshopping & I said to myself "cmmon who does a shopping of $19000 in a single store....yes you are right she shopped for 19 thousand dollars in a single store i mean approximately eight and half lakh rupees ...but i realised that i too have the same problem but not in such a big way (but cmmon for spending $ 19000 you need to even earn that much)...Nowadays i go broke till 20th of every month...yes u heard it correctly, so now u guys know when to call me up to help.

Finally  i have come up with few solutions that can hold me back for not going overboard with this syndrome:

1. I should burn my debit card.
2. I should donate all my money after paying for all necessary things, atleast the money can help someone needy rather than getting wasted to buy a lip gloss.
3. Write to all the online shopping portals to blacklist me from their customer's list
4.Change the user id & password of my Online banking & take a drug & erase my memory for the same.

Please drop in your suggestions if you have some serious ones!!!
                     
Till then Happy No Shopping !!

Story of a Blank Call

Hey all,

Today is saturday and one of the days where inspite of whatever happens i feel happy the entire day in anticipation of Off on Sunday..

I started this post to create my own space, to have freedom of writing, about, what i feel on a particular day or on an issue that i  have experienced.

So this one goes on how people have so much of time and are not happy about their own lifes that they play games of Blank calls with others , funny in the starting but at the end it becomes irritating even if you avoid it to a larger extent.I know people say avoid it, reject the call n so on but my poor phone even after having all the other hi end techonologies embedded into it, fails to have simple featues like reject calls and assiginig a silent mode for an individual number.....

Dont understand it...if someone wants adventure then go n do some adventure sports (Easy!!!!  n boss its safe to have fun that way) or want to listen to a any female's voice, buddy call any damn chick on your phone list, atleast u ll have a two- way conversation minus the slangs.There are so many serious cases that where  person have been so much harassed and are not able to track the caller, that they try to kill themselves or go in depression.It can be very serious at times too.

I think the service providers should have policies where if someone gives his/her proper credential and the service provider checks out that a particular number has really called up on the petitioner's no. they should provide the complete detail of ar****le and should call up from their side to give a warning...

But till then i think we have to wait n keep feeling victimised or have jugad in telecom circle n get the details of the anonymous caller and f**k him/her  hard.

This is the first time time that between the lines i have used slangs on my post, but cmmon i can write what i feel ...ITS MY SPACE.....

dont wanna blow anymore candle on the birthday cake

From my childhood , I have always seen my mum to be the most enthusiastic , friendly & cheerful person. She has always motivated me n my sis to go ahead and take up challenges of life and made us learn that whether you win it or loose it , you are going to learn something out of it anyways...So bottom line she has been my best buddy from the beginning, whether it was when i was five and learning to paint or the first time i won at the debate competition or i flunked in my maths test, came home after beating a guy or got beaten up ..she was always there to listen n make it more of an experience.

Of late she is dealing with some health issues n all these things are really effecting her enthusiasm..today i realised that its a very difficult thing to accept that one day my body will also get  older and weak, i know its going to happen, but i want my soul to be intact, full of enthusiasm , eager to learn, laugh and enjoy things which this life has given me....

Cross my heart would do anything to be me , the very me even after 30 years of writing this post.I want to smile reading this post after all coming years and feel I HAVE DONE IT!!


On the funnier note:

Thought of the day

~~When you're forced to stand alone, you realise what you have in you.~~

Itsy Bitsy

Sometimes i feel that everyday i overstuff my mind with so many things, things which are not necessary, things which makes me tempted to buy unnecessary liabilities, things which make me sad about an event in the past or things which force me to become insecure about the future and try and accumulate assets to make it comfortable as per my calculations now, its all stopping me to enjoy the moment which is right here , right now...

i go back home after work, watch somebody dancing on songs, biking, or learning lessons to woo a woman &  try to win something in a T.V. show. ..Question to myself -what do i get watching these people, neither i am getting inspired nor winning a contest at their places or even getting entertained... i really dont wanna spend rest of my stint on this earth doing nothing...

Am i the only one who feel this way?

Sunday waiting for you

Hey All!

I cant say TGIF! as i have to work tomorrow also, i am not cribbing about working but still i am waiting for sunday so desperately...want a DAY OFF badly....

love

Nimisha

AUGUST , 2nd

Its raining again beautifully today, after so many days.

 Last few days i  indulged myself in partying with friends , shopping & going to unvisited beautiful places and must say loved every bit of it. wanted to watch Harry porter in 3D & Zindagi Milegi na Dobara, out of which cud take out time for only the later one.

Its indeed a refreshing story after so long and must say now i am looking forward to future pieces of Zoya Akhtar after watching this.

Hey all Friendships' Day is coming , i know you would feel its a Childlike thing but i have to admit that i look forward to such " Child like " things, which makes me nostalgic of old days. SOS Call: the idea just struck me that i have to send something to all my close friend on this day and i know its a very short deadline but wanna do it, lets see if i can make it , as i seriously want to make them feel that i cherish each one of them and their part in my life.

Today i am wearing one of my favourite charm bracelets which i adore i dont know even why i am mentioning it here but love it......i half watched Julie & Julia movie, due to some or the other reason i never finish this movie completely , would do it at the earliest.

You n Me

I believe in memories
They look so, so pretty when I sleep
Hey now, and when I wake up,
You look so pretty sleeping next to me
But there is not enough time,
And there is no, no song I could sing
And there is no, combination of words I could say
But I will still tell you one thing
We're better together.

-Jack Johnson's "Better Together

MESMERIZED

The monsoons have arrived here, and i am loving every bit of it.Everything seems to be so fresh & alive, i can really smell the flowers , feel my breath inside me, love to hear the sound of rain drops at my window nothing seems to be more beautiful than this.

JUST ANOTHER DAY

hey all,

I think i have developed insomnia..yes ...i have not slept from last three days n feeling wierd.My colleague is on leave and me dealing with Union issues, Procurements, Daily operation , month end operation all by my own...i like to work when no one is around. There are so many TO DO's in my list which i have to finish...so managing it..I went through a Reveiw process like everyone else who's working & had Happy results which has finally increased my Buying Capacity ( I hope this continues in future also...).I am trying to download movies but i think there is some problem with my Torrent.

Have to send a mail to Mr. N of my commercial dept for certain procurements which are pending from long time...Procrastination is something which i practise but hate when it is exercised by others...i know it is very hypocrite of me but this is how it is....

Some times when i read about entrepreneurs, i also feel like starting a venture of my own, might be a small enterprise only but still...

Right now me reading a book : To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee (Thanks to Srijan)

P.S. i have promised myself that now onwards i ll be actively blogging..

See you all

My Wedding

Yes I do admit that I am lazy its been two and a half months that I wrote anything but I had a special reason for it , the same reason which initiated this post -My Wedding.

So the date was fixed , my shopping was on, where me mum n rakesh struggled from home to Kolkata…but it was all great fun, me laughing over rakesh while he was struggling between attires for the wedding, From Choosing our wedding cards to finalizing the venue , menu & Guest List. Sometimes it was tiring but rest on most occasions it was fun to do things by my own as my most important day was planned & filled with my own choices…

Somewhere I have heard that people who are present in your wedding are the ones who remain very important all your life and now I believe it to the T. Mausi, Ba, Madhu, Alpana, Srijan, Anupam, Mishra, Arijit, Akansha & Smita are the ones who took the wedding to another level, it was more like a reunion than a wedding & top of that my entire family including paternal & maternal side everyone was present …that was something.

Me, Madhu & Priti Jee packed Gifts together, went to shopping (see this shopping thing was not ending only), sneaked to have Meetha Paan (Note: I was not allowed to go out as the bride to be , so it was like bunking a class in the college when it is prohibited). My phone was snatched few days before the wedding as Mum including Madhu  & Alpana wanted me to start enjoying the occasion rather than talking to the Shamiyanawala or Caterers for the arrangements.

We had A-M-A-Z-I-N-G fun at Sangeet (for the first time I saw Srijan & Piyush dancing!!!!), Mehndi n Haldi ceremonies. Mum worked day –in day-out to make everything Picture perfect for me & she succeeded too, I know she missed Papa on every step while doing it all ,I could see it in her eyes.

Mummy  & Mumma

People dancing on the beats- Sangeet ceremony

My Mehndi

Now coming down to the D day, the rituals started from early morning, soon I heard that the Baraat came and I started getting nervous slowly. Baraat was received & everyone was going and meeting Rakesh and I WAS NOT ALLOWED, I mean obviously  ...but still... We all reached the venue (I was late, as always, mum panicked and I managed, as always). Soon I was ushered by my sisters to the stage and what… I looked at Rakesh and fell in love with him all over again...He was looking STUNNING with his smile and look in her eyes that don’t worry everything is going smoothly.. We looked at each other, smiled and exchanged the varmalas before everyone that mattered to us...

After Varmala

After which the marriage ceremonies started, series of rituals, most importantly Gathbandhan, Pheres, Kanyadaan & finally Sindoordaan..The best part was, that the amalgamation of both the Cultures was done very beautifully, each one respecting the other. I missed papa on every ceremony.

So finally I had a Royal Rajput Wedding which I always dreamt off & finally I am married to the person I loved…..this feeling is very beautiful feeling.